PERSPECTIVES

Perspectives
by Jezabelle Anne L. Josef

This is not a short story. This is more of how one's point of view differ from the other. Words that are misunderstood.


A. Clown.

A clown as what it’s defined is a comic performer in circus. He wears this silky over ruffled polka pajamas and dances in his own grace and beat. He puts on a too flashy wig sometimes orange or blue or rainbow-colored even.

In the Philippines, a clown is usually seen on birthday parties performing magic tricks with bunch of children watching (how they were amazed on how he made that one little bird disappear in his left hand. The children will burst into laughter while the other cynic kid will shout that the clown cheated claiming he saw him put the bird inside his long funny sleeves) him perform. He is present in most children parties, performing dances, magic or making animal balloons. In short, clowns are known to entertain, to perform, to carry a big big smile (even though he’s frowning). Bottomline, a clown is a symbol of fun and laughter.

(1.)
(At least to Victor, it is.) Victor is a half Filipino half Chinese doctor from a small village in Quezon City. He specializes as a cardiologist. He is tall, fair toned man with chinky eyes (which he got from his Chinese mother). Victor is very beautiful man if I may say. Many adored him. And though he casts a spell on any lady, he never took advantage of it. And frankly, he never really liked it.

Victor and his niece is watching the clown perform as he carry him on his lap. He felt this euphoria while he watch this old man with too much powder perform his below performance level magic tricks. How can this clown make him laugh? Make him elevate from more than happiness? This clown that has been no good in performing his job?

Victor cared less on how the clown performed, and sure it was not just because of the animal balloons that made him exaggeratingly happy. It was the feeling. Not that he is happy but he feels euphoric of feeling the feeling of being innocently happy. He knew right then that his youth will not be forever. His manly perfectly carved hard body will soon be out -modeled like that of his bloody red Aston Martin V8 car almost as old as he is. That soon, though not that very soon, he will wither away from a grape to prune. He didn’t care much of how he would look in 20 or 30 years but what he worries too much is how not innocent he will be in those years.

Victor was a consistent outstanding student and has been one out of the 75 students admitted to take intermed in the University of the Philippines. He was not the nerdy kid but rather very popular. They call him “the wit that brings it”. He didn’t like it. Confusing as it may seem, any of the commendations he got from his peers appealed nothing to him.

Getting back on the part that he worries on how not innocent he will be in 20 years, gave him a fright. Because he knew that innocence brings utterly joy to any man. Like that kid on his lap is experiencing. He is so damned thankful with his intelligence and at the same time so damned cursed. It’s cause he knew too much, he understood too much. That choosing to be intelligent is being innocent and choosing to be innocent is therefore being wise. And him watching that old not so funny clown made him get that feeling of "innocence" back to him. For even just a bit...

(2.) But not to Valerie.....

--To be continued--